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Welcome to humans*.

I first heard of Asperger Syndrome in 1995. The last line in an educational psychologist’s report on our older son, Jimmy — who, according to his kindergarten teachers, seemed to have “trouble processing information” — read “ADD or AS”.

I knew what ADD was, and I knew that wasn’t Jimmy. But “AS”?

“Asperger Syndrome,” said the ed-psych, almost on her way out the door.

A few minutes later, I typed those two words into an internet search engine. Nothing would ever be the same after that. The more I found, the more it made sense. Our initial response when it was suggested that something was going on with Jim had been the classic: “Oh, but that’s just Jimmy!”

Which it was. But the words coming up on the screen had the ring of familiarity. They described our son. In that first session, I came across various formal and medical descriptions of Aspergers and autism. But the website that struck home was not the work of experts, or formal, or medical.

It was O.A.S.I.S., a site created by Barb Kirby of the University of Delaware, who, two years before, had received an Asperger diagnosis for her own son. She was, she has admitted, “terrified”. But she found other parents online, formed a community and started her website. Our family will always be grateful to her.

The “autism web” is much bigger and broader now, of course, and, crucially, the internet has become a place for the neurodiverse to express themselves, communicate and organise.

That same internet is also home to some pretty vicious politics. The shock of diagnosis can do some strange things to people. I’d prefer to avoid that. One thing you can count on is that no one here believes that autism is caused by the mercury in vaccines, or, indeed, any other property of vaccines. We don’t seek, practically or philosophically, a “cure” for autism. We just want good lives for ourselves and those we love.

The site is organised along three basic themes: Places, Thoughts and Stories. Places means the places you can go to find out more about autism; the science, the politics, the culture. Thoughts is what you’re reading; a blog written by a group of three or four of us. You’ll meet the others over the next few days. And Stories is a forum for everyone in this world – autists, parents, siblings — to tell their own stories.

As we go on, it’s my intention that we advocate for better provision for autistic people and their families in New Zealand, and keep you up to date on what work is being done here. In particular, I want to see schools become better places for our kids. The Make School Make Sense campaign in Britain seems an admirable example for us.

We aim to complement, rather than compete with, existing organisations and internet resources. Please, let us know about things you think should feature on this site.

I promised back in March that I’d make this website — and then, with our younger boy Leo, out of school and in need of care and attention, rather regretted the promise. Parents with children like ours will know how stressful life can be. But I’m grateful to David Cohen for reminding me of the commitment, and suggesting that I launch humans alongside his moving new book, A Perfect World. I’m grateful to David and the others who have helped me get this far, especially Matt and Karl at Cactuslab, Kirsty Harvey (who came up with our lovely logo concept), Lesley Maclean and Hilary Stace.

David and I have an interesting history, and our children would not seem to outsiders to have much in common with his and Pamela’s son, Eliot, who is core autistic and non-verbal. But we’re all in this together. We share the strain, and relish the insight of living with someone who is truly, irreducibly different.

*The name comes from something Jimmy used to say. He would refer to other people not as people, but as “humans”. I always liked that.